We had been married for six months at the time. I was pregnant. He had no job here. Therefore, he told me that there was a job as a mill manager in Ampara and that he would be back in ten days. He never returned. The letter arrived only after a month. In the letter he had stated that he was confused, and he had asked me not to be angry at him. He also said it was difficult for me to be apart from me. The letter was brought in a truck which transported rice. This is the letter. He told me to write a letter and send it when the truck returns. I also wrote a letter and sent it. I don't even know if the letter was delivered. When the truck returned again, there was no letter from him. The people in the truck told them to put the tires on everything and burn them. I am holding on to my life for the sake of my child. Look at this letter. This letter shows that he loved me with all his life.

Wife – Virginie Mariadas (Age – 68)

35-year-old G. Mariadas was abducted in October 1990 while returning home from Ampara, Virginie said.

He loves cricket. He won’t be at home whenever there is a cricket match being played somewhere. He would ask me to look after the shop only for that day and he would go to play the match, and would only return after dark. I think the day he won this cup was a full moon poya day. They were celebrating and firing crackers. Our front entrance to the house was packed with trishaws. He would refer to Tendulkar as ‘Sendulkar’. He always says he (Tendulkar) is his favorite. India is his favorite team. I would also tease him by saying that he supports India while being a Sri Lankan. I remember his happy, smiling face whenever I see this cup.

Wife – Gnanaselvam Gnanamalar (age 50)

Gnanamalar says that on March 1, 2008, her husband Velusamy Punniyamurthy (32 years) had gone missing after he had taken an individual in his trishaw from the trishaw stand in Moneragala town. She said she was told that his trishaw was found in a forest area. When she had gone there, she was only able to find his slipper.

We only have one photograph of him as a memory. There were many photographs. We hid all those photographs away since our mother would get very emotional and cry if she sees his photograph. Now we do not know where these photographs are. We somehow managed to save this photograph. Our elder brother is a very active member in church. There used to be a group at the time. He was felicitated by our Bishop in Kandy for his contribution to church activities. I think this was during the early 1980s. I don’t remember the time exactly.

Brother – Croosepillai, age 62

Croosepillai says that his elder brother Sandanam Selvanayagam (34) went missing sometime in 1990 when he went to work in Amparai.

He was at home after studying, looking for a job. At the time he heard that there was need for blood in
irugala, Monaragala. So he went and donated. He got this as a gift for donating blood. He would not do anything without my consent. He had hidden the gift without my knowledge. One day I took everything out of the cupboard and washed them. I found the gift at that time and I questioned him about it. “Son, who gave blood? Whose is this?”. He replied, “It was me. I gave blood to a person who was in need.” I did not say anything after that. After that, he kept the gift outside where everyone could see.

Ganesan Amaravathi (age 52)

Amaravathi says that her son, Ganesan Mohanraj (age 21), who was at home after sitting for his advanced level examination, never returned home after going to play cricket on November 29, 2008.

He is the one who went to the bank and opened the account. He opened the account by depositing Rs. 1000. I do not remember whether it was a housing project. They deposited Rs. 25000 in this account. I think it was the government. We also deposited the cash we had. We also withdrew for emergency purposes. Now there is not much money in the account. Only Rs. 1000 or 2000. We are maintaining it in his memory. We do not have his signature in any other documents. This is the only one. We do not have anything with his handwriting. Therefore, I am protecting this.

Wife – Sachithanandam Padmaranjani (age 46)

Former LTTE militant Sachithanandam surrendered to the army in the presence of his wife Padmaranjani and two children.

I used to go to school from my aunt's home. We used to be in love since that time. I was 19 and he was 21 years old. We got married. We did not face any problems as both his family and ours were relatives. We registered our marriage after 2 months of the ceremonial marriage. There were 6 people who accompanied us to the registrar's office. This is the copy of the registration. We have the copy, but not him. I had gone abroad. I was abroad for six months when he went missing. At the time, my elder son was six years and my younger son was three. I was told of his disappearance after one month. This is the only thing that I have to remember him. I have laminated it so that it will not tear.

Spouse – Periaswamy Puththiran Logamma (age 44)

Logamma's husband Kandasamy Jegatheesan (38 years old) went missing in December 2008.

We left all his belongings here. We left our house with what we were wearing. He was inside the bunker even when the fighting was going on. We do not have anything which we used at the time. We only have an album. we managed to save a suitcase when we crossed Vattuvakal. That suitcase had the album. This album is the only thing that we have in his memory.
"This photograph was taken after he fell and injured himself when he had gone to pluck king coconut. He is a courageous boy and does not fear anyone. If there is any problem, you can be sure that he is involved right at the front. There is no point in talking about it now. What is finished is finished.

Father – Vallipuram Jayaveerasingham (age 58)

Jayaveerangam Hindujan, a student of 8th standard, went missing in Vattuvakal area.

We only have his Birth Certificate. We do not have anything else which belonged to him. We did have his photo album and clothes. We lost them at the last minute. We were only able to save this. His memory will never leave me. His memory will never leave me till I die. However, I still feel the agony that I do not have anything in his memory.

Mother – Jagatheeswaran Sarojadevi (age 62)

Sarojadevi says her son Ketheeswaran Madanraj, born in 1983, went missing in February 2009 among the crowd while displacing.

We do not have anything in his memory. We only took a few things when we were displaced from here. We left all his belongings here. When he came back, there was nothing. He is gone now and there is nothing we have in memory of him. The only thing we got was sickness after looking for him everywhere.

Mother – Rathnam Kamalambikai (age 74)

Rathnam Jagatheeswaran’s (age 30) mother saw her son for the last time on March 15, 2009 at Mullivaikal. She never saw him again.

I was the one who sent him to Colombo to get this passport. “There are problems here, please let me go mummy”, he said. He used to call me mummy. We somehow got his passport and sent him abroad. His father and I went to the airport and sent him off. Two years later he returned without telling me. We told him that the situation in the country is not good, but he would not listen. He had returned as I was not well. He was abducted by people who came in a white van when he was in Vavuniya. Now I hold this passport close. He was somewhere safe because of this passport. He returned and has gone missing.

Mother – Varathakesari Thavamani (age 74)

27-year-old Varathakesari Jeevadasan was abducted in 2008 when he came to Vavuniya after working in a Middle Eastern country.

He made this clothes-stand himself to hang his clothes. This stand would be 25 years old now. There are still pencil markings on it. We found this in our old house after we returned from the Menik Farm camp. It is broken as well. But he has made it neatly. He is good at this kind of work. No one hangs clothes on it now. We are keeping it in his memory, hoping that he would come.

Wife – Sivapunyam Rajini (age 53)

Rajini handed over her husband (Subramaniam Sivapunyam - age 40) to the army in Vattuvakkal in May 2009. She doesn't remember the exact date, but thinks it was during the last days of the war. She says that there is no information about him yet.

We bought and gave this chain to him after we sold the grain following the harvest. We used to be like that before. Once we sell the paddy, we would always buy chain for half a sovereign or quarter sovereign. This was a usual habit. In the event we do not have money for harvest, we would pawn the chain. This was how we engaged in agriculture. But, we have continued to keep this chain which was bought for him. We have not even taken it out. Our blood pressure increases if we take it and look. I only took it since you asked. The gold chain has blackened.

Father – Kathalingam Ganeshapillai (age 58)

Ganeshapillai says that he last saw his 24-year-old son on December 20, 2008 in Dharmapuram area.

He took this for his O/L examination. The school had filled up the forms, they were the ones who took him along to the post office. After that, my son went to the post office to collect the postal ID. I think it was in December 2008 when he sat for his O/L examination. We were first displaced the next month itself, on January 20th. We took whatever we had and left. This is the only thing left in his memory. I also have a pair of his clothes kept safely.

Mother – Ganesan Kathiramalar (age 61)

Ganesan Thiksankumar, a 16-year old school student went missing from the Pokkanai area on March 6, 2009. He had gone to the sea to bathe while the family were displaced in Pokkanai, but never returned. His mother Kathiramalar says that she is continuing her search to this day.

I think my grandson was old enough to be fed rice. Thats when he bought the bicycle. My daughter, him and grandson used to go everywhere by bicycle.
He used to take the bicycle to the well and wash it clean every day after coming home. The roads were not tarred at the time, so there used to be a lot of dirt on it when he came home. He would enter the house only after cleaning the bicycle thoroughly. That's how well he looked after the bicycle.
He did not say anything for two days after the incident. He couldn’t bear it. His bicycle was at the place where a bomb had fallen from a kfir jet. He saw his bicycle flying into the air and falling down. He showed the bicycle key saying that was the only thing he had. Now this key is the only thing we have in his memory.

Uncle – Sivasambu Dharmalingam (age 76)

His son-in-law Selambaram Bhuvaneswaran (age 39) went missing on 31st April 2009.

we dug this well before we were displaced. He (husband) was the one who told me to put my daughter's footprint. She placed her footprint, wrote something and said that the well and the house should be given to her. I still can not forget what she said. I remember saying, take anything, everything is for you, everything is for the children, we are not going to take the to the grave.

Mother – Balachandram Radharani (age 63)

Balachandram Kanadura (age 17) went missing in Mullivaikal area while being displaced.

A kfir jet dropped a bomb in our house garden, only then did we leave our home. We left everything behind. I kept nut (paakku) cutter in the betel bag. That is the only thing we have now. We could not save anything except his ID. I do all the work while being seated here. I know all who come this way. I am sitting here hoping that one day he will come running this way calling me ‘amma’.

Mother – Thulasiamma (age 76)

Thulasiamma, says her 21-year-old son went missing in 2009. She says she does not remember the day he went missing. Thulasiamma says that her son, who went to get some water when they were staying at a place after displacement, did not return.

This is the gift that his brother (Navaratnam) bought for his brother (Manokaran). I don't remember why he bought it. I only remember getting this and giving it to him after coming from somewhere far away. He also kept it safe. Look, it's as good as new.
This purse belongs to the small one (Manokaran). He always kept this in his pocket. There will also be some vibhuti in it. He would always have a Vibhuti on his forehead. There was also a picture in the purse. I don't know where it is.
They had gone to my elder daughter's house in Ampara and were both working at a brick making place there. One day some people came at around 11 pm and took both of them. So far there is no information about them.

Father – Mariappan Arumugam (Age – 73)

Arumugam's elder son Navaratnam (age 30) and younger son Manokaran (age 25) were forcibly abducted by people who had arrived in a jeep in the middle of the night when they were staying at their workplace after work.

This thaali is what I have to in his memory. We have five children. I have the memories of his life with me. I can keep on talking. But this thaali is special for me. We got married on the 23rd of July 1992. Ours was a love marriage. Our families were against our marriage. It was only 15 years later that he made a ‘thaali kodi’ and I wore it. I wore this thaali in 2007, after getting it blessed by the priest of the Vidaththalthivu Adaikkalam Madha Church. Do you know how many people have told me to take off my thaali? They tell me that he is not there, and that he would have come if he were living, and why I am wearing the thaali. We did not see him die. I would have removed the thaali if he had died before my eyes. I faced many challenges to bring up my children. But I did not give this thaali in exchange for money. Because, this is my man.

Wife – Anton Sukandan Atputhaseeli (age 52)

Thirty-five-year-old Anton Sukanthan was arrested by the navy on July 4, 2008 while he had gone fishing.

This certificate is the only thing we have with us to remember him. He was only 17 years old and was studying. He used to work at a shop due to hardships at home. He’s talented. Everyone used to say this wherever he went. He was the eldest son. If he were here, would I be in this situation? He would be devastated even if I was slightly ill. I don’t know what he is going through now.

Balasubramaniam Malini (age 47)

Malini says that they had to vacate their place while her son Balasubramaniam Bhojarajan (17 years old) was schooling. She said that she still cannot imagine how he went missing in the midst of thousands of people on 2009.04.19.

There is a coconut tree in her memory. She is the one who planted that tree. When we returned after being displaced, a piece of the tree was missing due to shell fire. We thought the tree would die, but now it bears coconuts. This time there are some good coconuts. Our son plucks them s and takes them to Trincomalee. The other children also refer to this tree as ‘Akka’s (elder sister’s) tree’ I also refer to this tree as ‘Loji’s (Tamizhini’s nickname). Now everyone asks if this coconut is from Loji’s tree.

Father – Sathyanathan Vijayendran (age 59)

Vijayendran Tamizhini (age 17) went missing on March 7, 2009 at the Mathalan Idaikkadu area. Her father says she was going for a bath but never came back, and he was told that the army had surrounded them. He searched till the last minute, until they reached Vattuvakkal, and is still searching.

Our marriage was a proposal. I liked him the moment I saw him. He does not drink. I would have been 19 years old at the time. I still remember the wedding day. We registered the marriage on 23 January 1999. We had our wedding the next month, on February 13th here (Mannar, Pallimunai). He tied the thaali here. Then wore the ‘koora’ saree and went to his village. They were the ones who contributed more towards the wedding arrangements. Our wedding was like the ones we have seen in movies. They held umbrellas, sang songs, and beat drums. Our wedding was special. This wedding photograph is the only thing I have in his memory. This photograph was captured by a boy who studied with me in school.

Wife – Antonita Ficcarado (age 43)

On April 6, 2007, we were returning from Thalaimannar for our village Church festival. On our way, he told me he had to get some money from someone and got off the bus in Pesalai. He never returned. Antonita Ficcarado, who started her fight with her sons who were six- and two-and-a-half-years old at the time Sebamalai Nelson Kanudasius (30 years) went missing, says she has been making ends meet with the help of relatives.

This was written when my son was born. I never take it out. Looking at this will be painful. So I keep it a place where I cannot see it. However, my heart aches and I take it and look at it. I have thrown away everything into the garbage. I have thought of throwing this away too, but then my son’s face flashes in front of my eyes. It strikes to me that this is the only thing that I have in his memory.

Mother – Sivapadham Rajeshwari (age 65)

20-year-old Sivapadham Sivadharshan went missing while being displaced towards the military control area.

I am the one who chose his outfits, not him. He would want me to choose and give it to him. These trousers were stitched from the material we bought. He does not like ready-made clothes. He prefers his trousers to reach the bottom, but prefers ready-made shirts. I bought this pair of trousers for no reason. He was going for computer class. I bought this for him to wear for classes. I left the suitcase containing all these clothes when we displaced. Our house was burnt when we returned. I found this trouser folded this way when I opened the suitcase. It was burnt due to the shell fire. I washed this trouser and have been keeping it in his memory.

I have 4 four girls and one son. He is my only son. I am scared that I may die before I see him.

Mother – Thavarasa Pagirathi (age 54)

In May 2009, Thavarasa Tamilchelvan (age 17) went missing from the Ambalavanpokkanai area.

She was able to walk from birth. She used crawl everywhere. We left the wheelchair in which we used to push her. However, we have her injection record card with us. We had kept all her documents in a bag and have given it to our youngest son. Thereby we managed to save the documents. This is the only thing we have in memory of her. This card has all the details about her growth and vaccination till the age of five. She couldn’t walk. We don’t know what happened to her.

Mother – Selvarasa Saraswathy (age 53)

Her son Selvarasa Kukaseelan (born 1991.09.06) and daughter Selvarasa Poojita (born 1994.05.22)
disappeared on 14 March 2009 and 13 February 2009 respectively.

It must have been 2001 and I was abroad at the time. I was here when he bought a watch with leather strap. He showed me this watch only after I returned home. He was a stickler to rules. He wouldn't spend money in vain. Therefore, we never ask anything from him. He would wear this old watch for special occasions such as weddings and ceremonies. That's why he had bought this gold colored watch. He said it was expensive. But, he did not to say how much it was. I did not ask him either. However, he would wear this leather-strap watch when he goes to the town.

Wife – Shanmugam Vasanthakumari (age 44)

34-year-old Kandasamy Ramakrishnan went missing on June 15, 2008. Vasanthakumari says that Ramakrishnan went missing after someone got into his trishaw in Moneragala town. The police only find the trishaw, she said.

We have a chain that we had bought for him. I have been wearing it in his memory. There was a pendent with a letter "K". I had misplaced it. We bought it for his second birthday. He (husband) went to Savakachcheri and bought it with the money he got for his birthday. He took it off and gave it to me when we were being displaced. I have been wearing it since then. But I have lost the pendent.

Mother – Yogeswaran Indradevi (age 57)

20-year-old son Yogeswaran Kaiyuran went missing on March 16, 2009 in Pokkanai.

My son used to go for English classes when he was in Dehiwala. The classes one takes to go abroad. This is the book that he took for classes. He is a studious boy and has a beautiful handwriting. Elder brother's daughter also has beautiful handwriting like him. Apart from this, we do not have anything in his memory. He was abducted from Wellawatte, Colombo. We don't know where he is now.

Mother – Balachandran Thanaletchumi (Age – 65)

37-year-old Balachandran Kandipan was abducted in 2007 while working in a clothes shop in Colombo.

Everything comes to mind when I see this photograph. This photo was taken on my grandson’s first birthday. This is the only thing I have. It must have been on the second month of 2009. A shell fell near this house and killed 11 goats. We took whatever we could and left the house immediately. This is the only one remaining. He is a naughty person. He’s of a dark complexion, so everyone at school and on the road used to call him 'Soolakaruppan'. He would throw stones at them. But, he would be ranked first in class from grade 1 up until grade 10.
I will never forget all the mischief he has been up to, till I die. I don’t know where he is, or what he is doing

Mother – Murugesu Thangamma (age 72)

Thangamma says that Murugesu Kulendran (22 years old) went missing in the Mullivaikal area in 2009 and does not remember the exact date of his disappearance.

Even when she was going to school, she used to go to the G.S office to help out with writing. He usually asks her to help him to fill family ration cards. He says she has beautiful writing. He would pay her some money every month for her help. She bought this dress by saving that money. It was ready made. It would have cost Rs. 200 at the time. This is the only thing I have in her memory. She had clipped a pin in the dress, which is still there.

Mother – Sivaguru Yamunadevi (age 57)

Mother Yamunadevi says 19-year-old Sivaguru Yazhini surrendered to the army.

We have our child's money purse. He also placed his signature on a book. I have torn his signature and kept it in his money purse in my desire to remember him. I was the one who bought this money purse. He said liked this colour, so I bought it in Kilinochchi for him. I used to go to Kilinochchi to visit the clinic. That was when I took my son and bought it. This is the last thing which he handed over to me.

Father – Chinnaiah Ramasamy (age 59)

18-year-old Ramasamy Kulendran went missing on February 18, 2009 from the Devipuram area.

The two children are the only ones we have to remember him. They were 5 and 6 years old at the time he went missing. I was 28 at the time.
It hadn’t rained in a long time. We were managing our lives by farming. Since there were no rains, he used to cycle from Vavuniya all the way up to Chavakachcheri and sell kerosene. He travelled along with many people. After he went missing, whenever someone comes this way on a bicycle, my children used to run shouting ‘appa is going’. Then they would weep saying that it is not their father. They would cry so long that they would even get fever. This is how I looked after my children.

Wife – Varatharaa Malavi (age 64)

Malavi says that Varatharasa (age 29), who left home on April 24, 1987 to sell kerosene and did not return home.

I have an earring of hers. I did not change it. I have two. I never give them to anyone. I keep it in her memory. I also have a bangle which belonged to her. Everyone wears that. I allow that to be worn since it has been used for generations. But, the earring was bought for her. I will not give it to anyone. She can wear them once she returns.

Mother – Nadarasalingam Thilakavathi (age 59)

20 -year -old Kavitha Nadarasalingam disappeared on May 16, 2009, from the Ambalavanpokkanai area.

Every time I See this photograph, I feel like he is somewhere. I have frequently seen him in my dreams. I have dreamt him where he would hold the window bar and talk to me. I was told to take a death certificate. I told them the same thing I told you. She is there somewhere. Why do you say that he is dead?
This photograph was taken when he was studying for hi O/L examination. There was a function in the school that day. That was why we took a photograph. Now I have only this photograph in his memory.

Mother – Raghunathan Rasathi (age 52)

16 year old (1992.09.11) Raghunathan Lavanya disappeared while staying in Mullivaikal area after being displaced.

This is a photo taken on his 21st birthday with a rose in his pocket. Our previous house was over there. We were the ones who organised this. He does not like being photographed and would run and hide. He agreed to this photo after his sister scolded him. We made an album for him after this. That album is also gone. We lost it while being displaced. We managed to find this photo since it was in my daughter’s bag.

Father – Sinnathurai Devarasa (age 70)

Devarasa Dayabaran (23 years old) went missing in Pokkanai. His father Devarasa says that his son went missing during displacement with a large crowd.

I only have photographs in memory of my son. There were many photographs. I have given photographs to every place I go to file a complaint. Now I only have two photographs in his memory. My son was working in a shop Chetty Street in Colombo. We were hoping that he would be safe since he was in Colombo. We were being displaced from one place to another. We don't know any details about when he disappeared. I have also been going everywhere, but I can't seem to find any solution.

Father – Anthony Jesurasa (age 63)

This is the Sarong that my elder brother wore, since he was 15 years old. This was the only thing we could take from his clothe he had left. I was covering myself with it when we were being displaced. I was seven ears old at the time. I was even wearing this at certain instances. Therefore, I managed to save this. "The only thing I have to remember my eldest brother is his result sheet. There were a lot of documents. But, we lost everything during displacement. We kept one of his diaries up until the last minute. But, we could not bring that too. "

Younger sister – Salini Chandrasenan (age 26)

Chandrasenan Vinodhan (1988) and Chandrasenan Virundan (1990) disappeared from the Mathalan area. Salini said those who were displaced had told her that the army had advanced and surrounded the place where the brothers were.

I bought a bangle, a ring, a bracelet and earrings for them. It was here in Puthukudiyiruppu. A person who from Trincomalee was the one who ran the shop. Whenever I got money in my hand, I would save it up and buy these things for my three daughters and wife. It was not expensive back then.
We only have these earrings in memory of my missing daughter. The other children are using the items which belonged to her. What’s the use of keeping this? We don't have our child with us. How can we have hope that she will come back?

Father Veeramalai Natarasa (age 78)

Veeramalai Sulochana (age 22) went missing in 2009. Nadarasa says that he doesn't remember where and when his daughter went missing. He says he has forgotten everything.

There is a Nelli tree that he had planted. He only planted one stick and now it has grown into a tree and is bearing fruits. One day, while returning from school, he brought a stick with him. I asked him what it was. He asked me if a Nelli tree would grow if he planted a stick. I said I do not know. I told him usually they plant a small tree. He planted and watered it. We were later displaced and were in a camp. When we returned, the stick he had planted had grown into a tree. This Nelli tree is the only thing we have to remember him now.

Mother – Kalimuthu Alagamma (age 63)

Kalimuthu Nagendran (age 17) went missing on 17th of February 2009 in Pachchaipulmottai area.

I have 6 children. All of them are boys. Not a single girl. But he is the one who used to do everything a girl child did. He cooks, washes all the dishes, washes all the clothes, and keeps the house clean. Whatever said, a household needs a girl child. After his disappearance, I am the one doing everything on my own. But no one can replace him. I don’t have anything to remember him, not even a photograph.

Mother – Anthony Filomena Feerado (age 74)

According to Filomena, 21-year-old Anthony John Velvees Feerado went missing on July 13, 2008 while working at an agricultural farm in Karisal, Thalaimannar. An old man who was working in the farm had asked her son to buy betel leaf around 5.30 pm. Her son who had gone to the shop never returned, says Filomena.

I think of him every minute. How can I forget him? We will only forget him when we die. If not, we will forget when we lose consciousness. Until then, we will not forget. I only have a photograph in his memory. I am living with him through his photographs given to me by the people after returning from Menik Farm. I don't know if I would still be alive if it weren’t for these photographs.

Wife – Ravikumar Mary Immaculate (age 54)

Wife Mary Immaculate says that on May 16, 2009, when their three-year-old son said that he was thirsty, her husband went to fetch water for him and he never returned. “The situation was so intense. Since he did not come, they sent us to a temporary camp. Those who came to the camp said they had seen him in Omanthai. Mary Immaculate said that they had told her that they had taken everyone who were alone in a bus.

This is the last undergarment he wore, it is worn by those between the ages of 17 and 18. We took with us whatever we could when we displaced. We only have a shirt and this undergarment as his memory. We continued to move from place to place amidst all the difficulties, with the hope that we could reunite with him. Who would have thought at that time that we would have to keep this garment as his memory. I lost my eldest son in a shell attack. I faced all those troubles to somehow bring him to safely, but everything was in vain. A photograph of my son along with others who were being displaced was published with an article on page 5 of the Virakesari newspaper on May 18, 2010. I have kept that safe as well.

Mother – Jacinda Rasamma (age 69)

19-year-old Ravindran Gajan went missing on March 6, 2009. Some people told her that they last saw her son at the Mathalan Hospital, says Jacinda.

This is the thali that he tied. I removed it as I entered the Menik Farm camp. As soon as I returned, I tied a yellow string as a thali across my neck. I handed him over. They said they would question and release him. Our two sons were only one and a half and four years old when the army took him. I haven’t seen him dead. I am still wearing this thali with the belief that he is alive somewhere. I will wear this till I die.

Wife – Georgerajan Rajeshwari (age 53)

Rajeshwari handed over her ex-militant husband Pathininathan Georgerajan (35) to the Army in the Vattuvakal area. She says that she was the one who forced him to cross over to the military-controlled area despite his reluctance, and had handed him to the army in the hope that they would release him after interrogation.

We have been displaced countless times. When we were first displaced from Jaffna, we left everything behind. We continued to move with the hope of coming back. In the end, we left everything behind in Mullivaikkal and crossed over with nothing but our clothes on. We had a suitcase which contained our passport, ID, and license. We left that suitcase to escape a shell attack. This photograph of my eldest son was with one of his friends. He had taken photograph as a group, there is no photo of only him. We took this photo from that group photograph. We got a photograph of our second son in the same way as well. These two are the only things that we have to remember them. We do not have anything to remember our daughter who also went missing.

Mother – Nageshwari (age 65)

Visiyakumar (son - age 37, disappeared on 13 May 2009 in Mathalan area)
Visyadharan (son – age 28, went missing in Mullivaikal area in May 2009)
Visyambika (Daughter - Age 35)

My son used to go for daily wage work. He bought this shirt from the money he earned daily. We don't buy much for him, he buys what he wants. He only talks to his mother, he goes with her wherever he goes. She keeps this shirt in the hope that he would return someday.

Father – Murugesu (age 72)

Murugesu Prabhu (age 27) went missing in 2009 from Pokkanai. He does not know when exactly it happen and he doesn't know if his wife knows either.

I have nothing to remember my elder brother. I only have the kitchen he built for me. That's the only thing I have to remember him. It was built for my wedding which took place in 1988. At that time, he spent a lot of money for my wedding. We renovated this house for my daughter's wedding. My children said that this kitchen was not in good condition and therefore had to be repaired. But I did not allow them to. This is the only memory that I have of my brother. We still cook in this kitchen.

Sister – Anthony Consensy Ficcarado (age 59)

On July 20, 1990, the Navy arrested several who were trying to flee to India from Mannar, including Consensy’s elder brother who was fishing in the seas off Thalaimannar. She said two Muslim individuals who were released by the Navy had returned and informed them of her brother’s arrest.

We bought this motorbike by selling my husband’s land in 1993 or 94. We bought it for Rs. 20000. When he was with us, we used to give cooked food to the shops and earn a living. He used to travel to far-away places in a bicycle. Therefore, we decided to buy a motorcycle. I still remember the moment he went to buy it like it was today. Now the motorbike is broken. Our son keeps it in his memory. His intention is to somehow repair it. When it was in good condition, someone wanted to buy it for Rs. 30,000. We did not have the heart to sell this bike which was used by my husband, and which had been the reason for our livelihood.

Wife – Angamuthu Rukkumani (34)

Rukmani says that on January 13, 2009 midnight, a group of unidentified individuals had arrived at her home in Moneragala and had forcibly taken away her husband, Kaththamuththu Thiruchelvam (43) for questioning. She says that a jeep was parked on the road at the time and they took her husband away after threatening them with gunshots.

This is the shirt which was given by his girlfriend for his birthday. He likes it very much and wears it very often. I don't remember her name. It was a beautiful name. He used to tell me that it was bought by her and then would ask me if it was nice. I would bug him by saying that it is much nicer than the shirt amma buys you. He would wear this shirt for church worship all the time. I have bought him a lot of clothes. But, he is so fond of this shirt. He has also got her many gifts. He has bought several gifts including lipstick, necklace, and nail polish. But he hadn’t given any of them to her. I don't know why. He had bought and kept all these gifts. I still remember, she came home and cried the day he disappeared.

Mother – Manuel Udhayachandra (age 67)

Udhayachandra says many people had seen Anton Senister Pirado (24) being abducted by the navy on November 11, 2008. He had gone on his bike, shirtless. It was the navy who had taken him. There are three Navy Check Points along the road which he was taken through. They would have definitely passed these points. If so, where did they take my son? Udhayachandra says that she cannot do anything even though she knew who had taken him.

My son studied in Point Pedro. He was staying with a relative. I went there after my son was disappeared and brought all the stuff here. This tie was also among the things I brought. I still remember that day when he came wearing this tie and these shoes. He went to Jaffna to study to become a doctor. Now his friends have become doctors. They themselves have said that my son was better than them in studies. Had he been there, he would have cured my illness.

Mother – Soosai Victoria (age 73)

Victoria’s 21-year-old son Jesurasa Jegaraj went missing on May 18, 2009. Victoria says that she lost her son because she took her daughter along with her. She says that witnesses had told her that he was put on a bus and taken away.

This chair was bought by my son before he got married. He had two chairs before this one. I think it was in 1995. They were blue chairs. I think it was the year our son disappeared, after the chairs were broken, he bought these two chairs and a stool. Only after he improved did we make some progress in life. I kept this chair in the room until last December but I had to take it out. I will watch over these chairs as long as I am alive. I don’t know if I will have to live with these chairs until I die.

Mother – Jesudasan Maria (Age – 65)

Maria says some people saw her 29-year-old son being abducted by some who came in the white van while talking with a friend at the beach. He had gone to the beach to wash the boat and load the nets on June 7, 2006, as he had to go to the sea that night for fishing.

He bought this phone in the first or second month of 2007. He had another small phone as well. But, he bought this phone just to listen to songs. It was an expensive phone at that time. He bought it in Mannar Town. Sony Ericsson was a popular phone those days. We did not give him the money. He bought it from his own earnings. He had kept this phone to be charged at his friend’s house just before he disappeared. In the end, this is phone is what we have. We wouldn’t have had anything to remember him if they had not given this phone to us.

Mother – Kumaraswamy Ganeswari (age 73)

Ganeswari says that her son, 38-year-old Kumaraswamy Ratnasingham was abducted on July 15, 2007. She says that he had gone with his friend on the bike to have some beer, but never returned. The friend who accompanied him also disappeared.

He kept a small diary in one pocket. I have also seen him writing in it. There is no specific time, but he writes whenever he is free. He kept it in his pocket the rest of the time. I only know that he writes poetry. I don't ask him anything. He doesn't tell me either.
He was eldest son, whom we were very fond of. The three who were born after him were girls. We do not have anyone to speak up for us, even if we have problems while going on the road.

Mother – Rajaratnam Mahadevi (age 53)

18-year-old Rajaratnam Sathyaratnam went missing in the year 2009 from the Suthanthirapuram area.

I used to see him in my dreams frequently, but not for the past six to seven months. I used to always see him in my dreams up until then. He would call me ‘ammamma’. Both his parents passed away when he was a little boy. I looked after him since he was eight years old. He was with me for 12 years. I have been wondering where he is for the past 14 years.
This photograph was taken in Mallavi. His elder sister is in Chettikulam, Vavuniya. She had requested for his photograph as she did not have any. This photograph was taken for her. He wrote something and gave it to me to hand it over to her. Now I only have this photograph and his hand writing to remember him.

Nagamani – (Maternal grandmother – age 88)

Grandmother Nagamani says that her grandson went missing in 2009 from Mulliavalai. She says she does not remember details such as the place and date.

She studied amidst a lot of difficulties. She was selected to enter the University of Jaffna. After completing her studies, she came here and was working temporarily as a teacher. We were depending on her. She was with her relatives when she was displaced, but she did not reach the Menik Farm camp. We do not know what happened. A photograph of her university graduation, a shirt and a bed sheet were the only things of her which her younger sister got. These are the only things remaining.
I moved to Pulmoddai after my husband got injured in the war. They said they would cure him and sent me away, they did not let me go with him. He also never came back.

Mother – Chandrasekaran Padmavathy (age 62)

Padmavathi says that she was hoping that her 28-year-old daughter Chandrasekaran Promina (28) would have reached the military controlled area safely after being displaced. She says continues to visit all the temporary camps and her legs have not rested to this day.

She never skipped a single fasting period. She would visit all the temples without fail. She bought this picture of a deity after she said that all the deity pictures at home were very old. She used to light a flame for this picture up until we were displaced. We did not take his picture with us since we believed that we would return. God protected this picture from termites. I handed her over to the army after she was injured. I could not find her afterwards.

Husband – Sellan Kandasamy (age 70)

Kandasamy says that he handed over his wife, 48-year-old Kandasamy Vigneswari, to the army after she was seriously injured due to shelling. He claims that the army asked him to leave instead of accompanying her. Kandasamy and his daughter have been taking part in all the protests in the hope that his wife will be alive somewhere.

We bought him this shirt when she was 14 years old. We bought it for the village temple festival. She wore it first to the temple. She liked this color and wanted it. Her elder sister bought it from her salary. She used to wear it with fondness and go around everywhere. We do not have anything else in her memory. We have three frocks. I am keeping this safe since this is her favorite.

Mother – Nagarasa Thavamani (age 66)

Nagarasa Darshini (15) went missing while displacement with her family.

I married him after falling in love with him. I would have been 19 years old at the time. He was 20 years old. I now spend my days with the memories of my life spent with him for for 6 years. Those memories are what keep me alive.

Wife – Roopakanthan Lucia (age 41)

On 16th January 2008 at 7pm, Murugaya Roopakanthan (25 years old) was threatened by individuals who arrived in a white van who had put a gun in his ear and had taken him from Vavuniya, his wife Lucia says. She says she had a 3-month-old baby, another one-and-a-half-year-old daughter and a 3-year-old son with her at the time her husband was abducted.

There was a teacher from Punguduthivu who taught us here. He has passed away. I went to see him and wrote. I am not a person who believes in such things. He was the one who said positively. Now if you go to the soothsayers, they would lie saying she is in some place. I don't believe in all this. You won't believe me if I tell you, I met 32 soothsayers while in the camp. If my child earns and gives me money, I would go see a soothsayer. I continue to fast even now. I don't know what will happen. The good thing about this, is that I only have this note as her memory. I do not have a single photograph.
If they say no, we would just keep a handful of rice. Now we are in agony and confusion not knowing if she is alive or dead. It doesn't it matter if she is dead, we would have waited and then wept. My mind will not rest even if I die.

Mother – Sivagnanam Thavamani (age 65)

21-year-old Sivagnanam Sathyakala went missing on May 16, 2009 in Vattuvakkal area.

He made a wooden tractor for himself. He was nine years old at the time. He used my saw, cut a (Mudhirai) tree and made it. He is smart. It used to be very nice, now it has been eaten by termites. We only had to tell something to him once. He does not like it if we say it over and over again. To others, this is only a piece of wood. But for me, it is his memory.

Father – Segar (age 66)

23-year-old Ananda Segar went missing from the Mathalan area in 2009.

He was the one who bought these earrings when she attained age. He went to Kilinochchi and bought it. We lost a lot of things before we arrived here. I somehow managed to bring this safely. We have faced numerous difficulties so far. We do not know what to expect next. No matter what happens, I will not give this to anyone. She is the oldest of seven children. I have lost her.

Mother – Chinnaiya Poologanayaki (age 49)

Chinnaiya Anusa was 18 years old when she went missing. Poologanayaki says she does not remember the details of when and where she went missing.

This was bought for my son's 19th birthday. We went to Mallavi Town, bought the material and stitched it. It's not that he likes this color, he likes me so much that he will wear anything I buy him. I liked this color, and therefore I bought it. He used to wear it with a lot of fondness.

Mother – Chandran Sivamalar (age 52)

Mother Sivamalar says that 19-year-old Chandran Sanjeevan was last seen on January 10, 2009 in the Udayarkattu area. Sivamalar says there were some others who had also seen her son in the military-controlled area of Omanthai.

This is a photograph which was taken when he was in the 9th grade. We would only take photographs during special occasions. Despite having such an occasion, we do not have a single photograph of him. We only have this photograph to remember him. I have enlarged it to take to protests. Who knew this would happen?

Mother – Kumar Chandra (age 62)

Chandra says that her 17-year-old school-going son went missing in May 2009 while they were displaced. She does not remember where he went missing.

We had quite a number of her photographs but everything was destroyed during our displacement. We had negatives of the photographs from the studio in a bag which had our documents. We made this album with the photographs developed from those negatives. I got them developed as soon as I came out of the Menik Farm camp. They told me they could not develop all the photographs. I think it was in 2010 - I took a pass to go from the camp to Vavuniya Town. They charged 15 rupees to develop one photograph at that time. I made this album with those photographs. This is what I have to remember her.

Mother – Muralitharan Mallika (age 46)

Daughter (Muralitharan Disya) was about 13 years old. She went missing in 2009 while in Mullivaikal. She travelled with the family along with the people as they were being displaced. Her mother does not know where she went. Mallika says they are still searching for her.

This is the bicycle which my son bought to go to school. He goes everywhere in this bicycle. To tuition classes, to the shop, and everywhere. His father also got a new bicycle. But he uses the one which was used by the son. The cycle was not in running condition, but he repaired it several times to ensure it was in running condition.

Mother – Chandralingam Maheshwari (age 70)

Sundaralingam Babu (age 27) went missing on March 19, 2009 in Udayarkattu area while he was being displaced.

It was not a special day. I bought this t-shirt and gave it to her when we went shopping. She liked it and she asked me to buy it. I did not like it much. But I bought it since my daughter asked me to. Now we have the t-shirt she liked, but I don’t have my daughter with me. I was taking her with me carefully, I do not know how I lost her. There was shelling and I did not know which way to run. People said they saw my daughter in the military-controlled area. I have looked for her everywhere. Now I don’t know where to go.

Mother – Velu Menakadevi (age 65)

Velu Dushyanthi (age 25) went missing in 2009.

This is the dress I bought for her birthday. But, she did not even wear it once. His father used to go to Vavuniya to frequently. She was the one who had told him to buy this outfit. We could not celebrate her birthday as we were continuously being displaced at the time. She took it with her everywhere. She wanted it and got it, but could not wear it. The color has not faded. This is what we are living with now.

Mother – Thangavel Valarmathi (54 years old)

Thangavel Keerthana (14 years old) went missing on 27th February 2009 in Pokkanai.

This tree would be my son’s age. He is the one who planted this tree. He has planted most of the coconut trees in this garden. He worked and earned when he was with us. He has made sure that we have income when he is not there with us. We do not have anything in memory of our daughter. That is a huge heartache for us.

Mother – Chandravadivel Vijitha (age 53)

Vijitha says that her son Chandravadivel Chandraprakash (age 20) went missing while being displaced. Her daughter Chandravadivel Naguleshwari (27 years old) had gone missing in the Vattuvakal area.

When you look at it, it is like a shirt worn by grown-up people. But, this is the shirt worn by my son when he was 16 years old. He was well built and tall. This was bought to be worn at his uncle's wedding. He did say it was a little big on him them, but he wore it nevertheless. All four kids in the house had to get the same type of clothes. If not, it was a big problem and one would wear the clothes. I took everyone to Kilinochchi and bought clothes because it was a special day. He used to wear this shirt up until the last moment. It will be 15 years. I still have it. Hoping that he will come back.

Mother – Thiruchelvam Nagadevi (age 63)

Nagadevi says that Thiruchelvam Akilan went missing from the Anandapuram area in 2009.

This is the mango tree which was planted by our son when we were being displaced. It was bearing fruit when we returned. He planted two trees. One is dead. This is what he used to do. He always worked to keep the house and the garden beautiful. People used to say that this tree would damage the house. I'd say let it be since it was planted by my son. This is the only thing we have in his memory.

Mother – Arulambalam Sriranjani (Age – 65)

Arulambalam Prabhakaran, born on 13.10.1982, went missing on 8th March 2009

He is god fearing. His used to run a decor business for weddings and other social events. Every time he goes to work, he comes to this place, lights camphor and worships. He also planted this Neem tree. We stopped worshiping at this place after he went missing. What is the use of worshipping now?

Chitrambalam Raghunathan (age 72)

16-year-old Raghunathan Kowsigan was forcibly recruited into the LTTE during the last phase of the war. However, Chitrmabalam Raghunathan says he saw his son surrendering to the army during the final days, after he moved into the military-controlled area.

I have nothing to remember him. I had some photographs, but I had to leave everything behind when we were displaced. I have kept his ID card safe with me. He went to Jaffna for studies and never returned. He went there for some school related work. They said that the military had surrounded the area he was in. I don't know what happened. One son was killed in a shell attack while being displaced. The other son is also not with us. I have a daughter, but she is unable to do anything. I have to take her with me wherever I go. That's why I don't go to protests. This wouldn't have happened if he were there.

Mother – Sabaratnam Thillaynayagi (age – 73)

Thillainayagi who claims that her son Umakaran Sabaratnam was abducted by the army also says that she is looking after her daughter with special needs amidst hardships, without anyone to help her. She also says that she is unable to take part in protests to seek justice for her son, as she cannot leave her daughter alone.